Dream Maker: New Year Vision, Picnics and Being Prepared

For a Dream Maker, Having a Vision is only part of Being Prepared to Make that Vision Come True. In my life training to become a Dream Maker, I learned a good lesson when I was planning a picnic.

It was the first time I was in charge of making such a production. So many things to bring and needs to meet. Coordinating such a feat seemed almost overwhelming, but I wanted to make it a truly enjoyable experience for all of us.

I stood in the kitchen a bit at a loss, thoughts piling into multiple lists swirling through my head, not sure where to begin. My mother watched as I clearly struggled to make sense, grabbing items as I wandered from one end of the kitchen to the other.

By Unknown illustrator [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

“Outdoor Luncheon” By Unknown illustrator [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons

“Imagine an empty table,” she suggested. “Then set the table with everything you need to have your meal and enjoy your day.”

Immediately I remembered long picnics at San Francisco’s Ocean Beach where dad surf-fished while we ran in and out of the waves. Or picnics with cousins at Alameda’s shoreline beach, our moms dutifully stationed at the combined picnic spot ready to meet our needs so we could continue with our important work of play.

In each instance, we were free to wander and enjoy because we always knew where to return for food, water, towels, bandaids, hugs, sunscreen, rest, and whatever else we needed.

Setting the table is the same as making sure you can implement your vision. You have an intention of the experience you want to provide. Then having all the tools and fuel and resources available that you anticipate will be needed ensures fewer delays in making your vision come true.

Whether you are planning your personal life or your career/business, here are some Dream Maker planning tips to have a successful new year:

  • Connect with your purpose in life and in your work.
  • Review what went well this year, and what needs improvement.
  • Dream where you want to be in two to three years, and strategize how to get there.
  • Define your vision for the new year.
  • Identify milestones and big goals for each quarter.
    • Break those goals down into smaller, achievable chunks.
  • Define what your client needs to experience before moving on to the next step.
    • Review your systems and walk through every step in detail.
    • Identify who you need to collaborate with in order to make each step happen successfully.
    • Identify resources needed and how you will have them in place.
  • Commit
    • to your clients.
    • to your bottom line.
    • to your life dream.

Prepare these main pieces to plan for your success in the new year.

If you would like help with aligning your life with your business planning, send me a message.

For more on workshops and events, go to DreamMaker Retreats .

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Gratitude Day 4: Fathers

On this 4th Day of Gratitude, I give thanks for my father, and all the fathers in the world.

Every day I walk by two places where my father’s watchful gaze is seen. Though he isn’t with us any longer, my memories are strong and inform my every interaction.

The Yang to Mother’s Yin

When I think of Dad, my memories are filled with how he showed up in the world – at home, at work, in the community, in organizations. Whether in public or in private quarters, my dad showed me how to interact one-on-one with whatever was in front of me.

Gratitude Day 4 Father by Baylan Megino

Gratitude Day 4 Father by Baylan Megino

Dads do that. They show us how to DO things – how to observe, analyze, plan and implement so that we can get the result we want.

They teach us how to think about our part in the whole. Sometimes we have to think of what is in the best interest of the greater good, and choose between our individual desires and what will be best “for all concerned.”

They show us the individual attitude needed to persevere in difficult times, as well as the way to step back and be part of a team while maintaining our individuality.

They also show us when to step aside.

It’s hard for me to write about being a dad.
I’ve never been a dad and never will be.

I can only share some of the images that I am grateful for that are indelibly etched in my memory:

  1. Watching Dad make a kite out of bamboo strips, then flying it in the Knights of Columbus kite-flying contest
  2. Fishing in the Ozarks and catching lots of bluegills
  3. His erect stance, with head slightly tilted, a smile curling up the edges of his mouth.
  4. His / My hands
  5. The way he called me “Girl” – only a handful of times
  6. Standing alone with him behind the church entry doors as the Love Theme from “Superman” began to play, he touched my arm, slightly raised his eyebrows, and gently asked, “Are you ready, girl?”
  7. His gentle touch
  8. His anger at injustice
  9. Playing chess after work with my aunt
  10. Wearing plumed hat, satin cape, and sword as Grand Knight and part of the Knights of Columbus Color Guard
  11. Dancing with all the widows and older single women, but Mom always had the last dance
  12. Baiting the hook and fishing at Berkeley Pier
  13. Smoking Kent cigarettes, the stick pursed between lips and tilted up so the ashes wouldn’t fall
  14. The glow of his cigarette in the dark as the trash mound burned
  15. Carrying Mom’s big camera case wherever they traveled
  16. Michelin Man
  17. Bowling with community groups
  18. Singing in the church choir
  19. Connecting with the land and its cycles at the almond orchard
  20. Planting green beans and tending to the garden every evening
  21. Opening envelopes by tearing off the end
  22. His joy on our first visit to the Philippines and pride in sharing his family
  23. Putting on the Igorot hat, squatting on the hillside and looking into the distance, cigarette held between his lips
  24. Fishing at Ocean Beach with the long ocean fishing poles
  25. Fishing derbies at Lake Chabot
  26. Dad with my cousin and his young male friends
  27. His willingness to try anything
  28. His mischievousness – climbing the statue at the St. Louis FANHS Convention
  29. Fixing the car
  30. Figuring out how to DO things
  31. Being

Like many, my relationship with my father was up and down. We were much alike, so eventually gave each other wide berth when needed. In those times, as now, those many memories gathered over the years kept us connected.

I am so very grateful for those memories. And for the man who made them and me possible.

Thank you, Dad.

Today, give thanks for your father. If you can, tell him. Even better, show him.

Blessings and peace,

Baylan

 

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The Entrepreneur’s Journey: The Risk It Took To Blossom

The Entrepreneur’s Journey is not a straight path. Anais Nin wrote, “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”

The Risk It Took To Blossom, photo by Baylan Megino

The Risk It Took To Blossom, photo by Baylan Megino

My life had a fairly straightforward beginning, and the American Dream was the lifestyle I was encouraged to build. By my early 30’s, I had the loving husband with a steady job, a family, a comfortable home, the cars, the great job. I even had community involvement under my belt.

But something was not right.

My normally happy, calm outlook had become spiked with occasional fits of temper, which confused me.

I sought help in understanding what was happening, and started seeing a counselor. Those sessions helped me to see myself and my situation with clearer vision and understanding.

LIfe had become an endless round of work – home – work – home – community – work … of fulfilling roles, obligations and  duties.

At one point in my life, I had sought refuge and solace in attending Mass every morning before attending classes. The calm, the routine structure, the expansive space, and the connection to God fed me deeply.

But at this point, my spiritual and life had become almost non-existent, because I was so busy taking care of everyone and everything else that I thought was important.

Wrong. It wasn’t working for me.

It was time for a major change, and managing relationship change was something that I was absolutely, positively not equipped for. After all, my mother married the man who took her on her first date! Though they remained faithfully married until his death 60 years later, I did not learn a healthy way to handle conflict in relationships.

The counseling sessions helped open the door for me to step back and start at Ground Zero — to look inside to find my thoughts and need for expression. Through painting and sculpture I discovered a hidden world within that showed me my feelings and the inner terrain of my being.

Through sharing I learned that I had something of value to express in the silence. Through writing I started to hear my own voice and to value the power of the word.

And through dance I had always been able to access my inner knowing.

I had opened the door to start exploring my life, to understand what I was all about and what I had built. Once that door was open, how I saw the world and how I navigated each moment would never be the same.

The tightly bound bud was starting to unfurl her petals.

 

Step 1: Your Conscious Living Begins When You Stop

We live in a crazy, information packed, fast-paced, high density world pushing us to do, do, do. Creating a life of conscious living begins when you stop.

Time to Stop

We rush from place to place, project to project, person to person, text to phone call to email to text, and start all over again. Like a hamster on its wheel, the running is endless. That is, until we choose to step to the side and Stop. Conscious living means we are aware of ourselves and our world.

Stop to Breathe

As we are running around in this hamster-run we call life, sometimes we are happy. We feel our work is making a difference, and we feel fulfilled. We laugh, we enjoy friends, we feel love. Yet there is so much pressure to keep up with what everyone else is doing – To be there in case something happens – To be sure to be prepared for whatever could happen – To be able to share what happens – To be able to help whether we are needed or not. For whatever reason, we keep running to keep up. Who knows what we might miss if we didn’t!

Aren’t you exhausted? Why don’t you take the time RIGHT NOW to stop. Just for a few seconds. Just stop. First, Stop. Then Breathe. Take the time to stop and breathe.

And then pay attention to your breath, and your body as you breathe. All that running often requires that our muscles must tense, and our energy must be on alert.

Conscious Living: Being in the World

Conscious Living: Being in the World

Stop to Listen

In this moment of attention, listen to the thoughts that come to your mind. Give yourself the honor and respect to listen — to you. Sometimes you  may hear criticism and urging to start up again. Let those thoughts just float away. Acknowledge them, and let them go. Listen instead to the thoughts that are positive, supportive, loving. Listen to the thoughts that tell you what IS, and that hold behind the words a gentle yet firm support that you know what is needed. Listen to the messages to make choices that are Yours, and not someone else’s.

Stop to Feel

The body is an amazing computer with a mind of its own. I believe it does not lie. Listen to what your breath and muscles and nerves are telling you. Be open to knowing what you are feeling physically. Where are your muscles tense? Where are you holding or compensating? Are you holding your breath? Do you feel pain?

Scan your body. Are there areas where you cannot sense much – areas that are like blank spots? You know they are there, but are not aware of them? Sometimes it’s the back, or the backs of the thighs, or any place where you don’t normally expend any energy. Just note these places to yourself.

Then check what your emotions are in this moment. Are you happy? Excited? Sad? Depressed? Apprehensive? Whatever emotions you feel, acknowledge them. They are yours, ready to help you decide and understand your next step.

Stop to Be

Do, Have, Be. “If I Do X, then I will Have Y, and I will Be Z.” However, now we know this is backwards.

Be, Do, Have. We must Be what we envision so we know what to Do that we are here to do so we will Have what we want. That is the core of a Conscious Life.

How do you Be? Well, you are doing it right now.

Stop. Breathe. It is in this moment that you are conscious of Being. No forward movement,no worrying about the future, no focusing on the past. Just being. So be here now. Then listen and feel. And make your choice for the next moment.

So in order to begin living a conscious life, allow yourself first to Stop.

 

 

Giving Thanks in 2014

Thanksgiving Sun 2014 by Baylan Megino

“Thanksgiving Sun 2014” Copyright 2014 Baylan Megino

Before this day is over, I want to Thank You for Being.

Before this weekend is over, I wish you and your loved ones time to connect.
Before this month is over, I wish you an abundance of opportunities to see how much of true value you already have, and that you continue to bring to the world.
Before this year is over, I wish you great clarity on the path forward.

And know
To live each moment is a gift.
To connect can be a lifeline.
To know your gifts can bring you peace.
To share those gifts is to make possible a better world.

I thank you for breathing.
I thank you for being a gift of light.
I thank you for showing me how wonderfully magnificent you are.
I thank you for sharing space with me.
Thank you.

Blessings, light, and peace,
Baylan

“Thanksgiving Sun 2014”
copyright 2014 Baylan Megino